Q: My ex and I have one child together. We separated due to repeat incidents of domestic violence. We are currently in a custody battle where I want sole custody with visitation and he wants joint custody. I have temporary custody of our child and a restraining order against him. I really want to serve in the air force but am not sure if he can fight for and get custody while I am away in basic training. My fiance and family are more than capable of taking good care of her, but I'm afraid since he is her father, that he can and will take our daughter. Am I legally obliged to tell him I will be joining the military? Can he find out? It would be an honor to serve and a great way to make a better life for my child, but not at the expense of her safety and overall well-being.
My daughter's father and I were never married.
A: David's Answer: I don't think the Court would deprive you of custody if you're away for 2 months or so (though he would be entitled to have the child during that time). But you should strongly consider that if you're deployed, he'll be presumptively entitled to custody during such time. Your return from active duty, however, will by statute be considered a "change of circumstances" allowing you to petition for a return of the child to your custody. Before making any decisions, you're well-advised to schedule a consultation with a NYC Child Custody attorney.
-- David Bliven, Bronx Child Custody attorney (www.blivenlaw.net)
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