Thursday, January 30, 2014

Can I move out of state even if the father of my daughter has not responded to the notarized consent form I sent him?

Q:  im moving out of state to be with my family. I have a court order in place where I have sole custody of my daughter and he has some visitation for every other weekend which he doesn't follow through with. I told him 3 months ago of me planning on moving and he never wanted to speak about it. I sent him a letter with a parenting plan where he will get her for the summer and alternate holidays for a week at a time. He has yet to respond. Whats the worst that can happen if i leave. He is not a good talker. I gave him the address where I will live and everything. He barely does anything at all with my daughter.

A:  David's Answer:  The worst that can happen is that he files a petition in court & the Judge orders you to return the child to the state at your expense. Indeed, the Judge may even consider this as a factor against you in deciding whether to switch custody of the child to the father. I'd strongly advise against moving without court permission, especially not without sitting down with a NYC Child Custody attorney for a full assessment.   -- David Bliven, Bronx Child Custody attorney (

Can I move to out state to live with my mother cuz I don't have no help here?

Q:  I want a better life for me and my kids so I want to know what's right for me and my kids.. Can you please help me. .

A:  David's Answer:  You are best advised to get a court order allowing the relocation. I strongly disagree with any opinion expressed saying that if you don't have a court order you're free to move even without the non-custodial parent's permission (or court order). I have been involved in too many cases in which the custodial parent did just that - and was ordered to return the children to New York at their expense. Schedule a consultation with a NYC Child Custody Attorney for a full assessment.   -- David Bliven, Bronx Child Custody attorney (

Sunday, January 26, 2014

Can I get full custody while I'm married?

Q:  I'm not planning on getting seperated from my husband anytime soon. So I wanted to know if I the mother could get full custody of my daughter. My husband is not a bad guy I'm just afraid if we go down the wrong road he will take her from me and he is the type of guy that doesn't know how to take care of a baby I do everything.

A:  David's Answer:  I agree with Ms Fiss - one cannot generally file for custody while still residing with the other parent. The exception is if you are imminently separating. If you are not, then you can raise the custody issue within the context of a divorce filing, but otherwise would be precluded from proceeding on a custody filing in Family Court. Schedule a consultation with a NYC Child Custody lawyer for a full assessment.  -- David Bliven, Bronx Child Custody  attorney (

If my relocation is granted with my children and the father files a stay, can I still relocate and how long can he hold us up?

Q:  I have 4 children, two sons with the man Im in court with. I am trying to relocate and proposed visitation will allow for him to spend more time over all with our sons but visits will not be as frequent. I have agreed to pay for transportation costs promote/ensure daily communications. My daughters father resides in the state Iam moving to where there are better resources and quality of life for all involved. Not to mention I suffer from a disease that is aggravated by extended cold weather, so moving to a warmer climate would be beneficial as per my physician. I have submitted the names/info of my physicians so that my medical documents may be requested. I have researched this ares homes, schools, doctors, resources, etc.

A:  David's Answer:  If the court has entered a "stay" - meaning you cannot move without further order of the court, then you cannot move. If you do, you risk being held in contempt (& possibly jailed for up to 6 months), or the Judge switching custody, or the Judge ordering you to move back at your expense. Please see my reply to your other posting. -- David Bliven, Bronx Child Custody attorney (

What are the repercussions of relocating against a court order? What are my rights and what is the court process?

Q:  The father of 2 of my 4 children does not want me to relocate. However we have visitation and child support orders through the courts. We have been to court twice and have a third meeting with a referee and its been over 9 months now and we still haven't gone to trial. He doesn't want custody, just wants to be controlling and dictate my life. What can I do to make this process go faster or to help my case and be allowed to relocate?

A:  David's Answer:  It's hard to assess what exact steps you can take in your case, simply because there are many, many factors the court considers on a relocation case. Having a good lawyer at your side may help the process go faster, so if you don't have an attorney (or don't have a good one) - get one. Schedule a consult with a Bronx Child Custody attorney for a full assessment.  -- David Bliven, Bronx Child Custody attorney (

Saturday, January 18, 2014

How do I go about changing my 10mth old sons last name to mine? Based on my story below, what would the process be like for me?

Q:  Sorry, personal but i need help. After 1st baby I started working at a bar, his dad & I broke up & went our seperate ways no contact at all. I met a guy I had a one night stand with & got pregnant, never seen or heard of him again, dont even remember his name. When I was 3 months preg. my 1st sons father and I decided to work things out even though i was preg. by someone else. After giving birth I gave my baby his last name but when the baby was 2 months, he said he couldnt deal with taking care someone else baby & dissapeared. Til this day i havent heard from him I take care of my kids on my own & I dont want to change his sons last name but I would like to change my youngest sons last name to mine, thats not his father & his name or info isnt on the birth certificate. How to go about it?

A:  David's Answer:  this would not be a chid custody matter, but instead a "change of name" proceeding.  -- David Bliven, Bronx Child Custody attorney (

How can I get approved by the judge to move with my son from NY to PA, while still trying to get sole custody?

Q:  I am about to be evicted so I have to move immediately and was planning to in August anyway. I already put in a petition for the move but he refused the papers when served.

Additional information
My son has also lived with me since birth. His father has no job, pays no child support even though there is an order for only $50 a month, and has no stable place where he lives.

A:  David's Answer:  There would be many different factors the Court will consider, such as whether you're moving to be closer to your support system (i.e., relatives), whether you'll have a job waiting for you, and what efforts you've made to look for housing in NYC. The Court will also consider how often the father visits the child & how close the relationship is. You're best advised to schedule a consultation with a NYC Child Custody attorney for a full assessment. -- David Bliven, Bronx Child Custody attorney (

Does my ex-husband have the right to overnight visitation with our child while living with multiple roommates?

Q:  We have been legally separated for nearly three years and I have both legal and physical custody of our child and per our separation agreement visitation is arranged by me. He has not been particularly involved and more or less appears every four to six weeks and spends around 7 hours with our child. Every now and then the topic arises that he would like to have our child the entire weekend. However, he lives together with 6 other individuals and our child would not have an own room. Our child is 7 and I don't believe this is a suitable environment for a young child, especially considering that their relationship is not close and his involvement has been sporadic at best. Does he have right to overnight visitation in the state of NY considering his living situation?

A:  David's Answer:  It's not so much a "right" as it would be his request to the Judge if the two of you can't resolve the issue. The particulars of the bedding situation may be the difference, as well as how big the bedroom is, who these other people are (e.g., family, close friends, or mere tenants), etc. Schedule a consultation with a NYC Child Custody lawyer for a full assessment. -- David Bliven, Bronx Child Custody attorney (

Wednesday, January 15, 2014

Is there a way for step parent to get some legal rights for a child of a person he's married to?

Q:  Planning to marry a person with 2year old son ( father deseased). As I checked as stepfater I will have no rights for the child in NY state. Is there a procedure for me to obtain some right the real father would have? And what are they? Mother does not mind to share her responsibilities/custody.

A:  David's Answer:    You would commence a step-parent adoption. Are you married to & living with the child's mother? This would generally be necessary for such an adoption. Schedule a consultation with a NYC Family Law Attorney for a full assessment. -- David Bliven, Bronx Child Custody attorney (

Who to proceed

Q:  have established extra circumstantial circumstances ! Going back to court for full Custody/Visitation/Co Parent. How do we get a NPA Forensic eval???

A:  David's Answer:  If you're filing in Supreme (post-judgment in a divorce case), then you'd file an order to show cause for modification. If you're proceeding in Family Court, it's a petition for modification. The Forensic is generally appointed by the Court - they have their own list they work from. Thus, if you have someone in mind, you can suggest that person, but if it's going to be a court-appointment, that person must be on the court's list. Schedule a consultation with a NYC Child Custody lawyer for a full assessment. -- David Bliven, Bronx Child Custody attorney (

My Ex is demanding the Forensic Evaluator do Extra Work - Home Visits

Q:  The Forensic Evaluator estimated 40 hours of work to complete his evaluation. But now because I wouldn't accept a settlement offer without changes My Ex is using home visit by the evaluator to harass me. The Evaluator admitted that he normally doesn't do "home visits" but is doing this on the insistence of my Wife. My Wife told me she would do this to harass me and cut off my being allowed to see the children. She is convinced that If I don't get to see them she will get some sort of child support. This even though she is monied spouse and I was the one who was at home taking care of the children,

If I say no home visits the forensic guy will be ticked off because that is an extra $2000 he won't get. If I say yes I am inviting this guy into my house to make who knows what accusations,

A:  David's Answer:  I'd suggest to write the evaluator an e-mail & ask him again why this "home visit" is necessary. If he puts in writing that he's only doing it to placate your wife, then this may be seen as a form of bias & may either result in his/her removal or for the Judge to disregard his/her evaluation. Speak to your attorney, though, before doing anything. If you're looking for a 2d opinion - or you don't have an attorney - then schedule a consultation with a NYC Child Custody attorney for a full assessment. -- David Bliven, Bronx Child Custody attorney (

Saturday, January 11, 2014

Joint legal physical custody 2nd year in a row ex wife claims child?

Q:  We both work low income jobs and we both support her fifty fifty. I have her 3 days she has her 4 but I pay bills on our daughter. If she wants to claim her again so she can try and take me back to court on absolutely no grounds can I stop her? She says she will not loosen up and she verbally agreed when the court order was made on our daughter to alternate years on taxes. The attorneys even tried to put it in and couldn't because it is not a divorce agreement. Any helpful information?

A:  David's Answer:  First, it seems this is less of a child custody question & more of a child support question. That said, if you have a divorce agreement and you did not put into the agreement that the tax deduction would alternate, then it is very unlikely a Judge would allow you to now modify the agreement on that basis. You would have generally needed to include that provision in the original agreement. That said, you're best advise to bring in the agreement, along with any orders/judgments, to a NYC Child Support lawyer for a full assessment. -- David Bliven, Bronx Child Custody attorney (

My child's mother lives in NC, and I'm a resident of NY. Will the NC courts grant me visitation rights across state lines?

Q:  We became teen-aged parents; we're both now 25 yrs old; we were never married; our son is 8 yrs old; I pay child support through NC Child Support Enforcement; I realize we need to be amicable for our son's sake; she's insistent on not getting along unless it's something that she wants; she will only allow me to see our son in her presence; she will not allow him to visit me in NY without her; I love my son dearly! What's the proper course of action?

A:  David's Answer:  If there are no prior orders of custody or visitation which were issued in NY, then you'd need to file your visitation application in the state of NC. As such, you should re-post your question using the geographical area in NC where the mother resides. -- David Bliven, Bronx Child Custody attorney (

As an american citizen living abroad, what steps do I need to take to petition for sole custody of my child/children?

Q:  I am a an american citizen who lived on and off (never married) with a Dominican resident alien in the U.S. since 1994. In 2002, because of legal issues he was involved in, he decided to move to Dominican Republic. In order to keep the family together, shortly after I decided to follow him along with our 6 year old. I gave birth to our 2nd child in 2004 (birth abroad). Time after, in 2011, I decided to permanently end the relationship. The children live with the father. I will going back to the states in Feb. 2014. My children (both american citizens) are now 17 and 10.

A:  David's Answer:  If the father is not consenting for you to bring the children with you, then you will need to file for custody in D.R. As such, I'd advise to schedule a consultation with a D.R. Child Custody lawyer for a full assessment. -- David Bliven, Bronx Child Custody attorney (

Wednesday, January 8, 2014

I would like information on child custody rights in NY state as myself and boyfriend were living together but now splitting up.

Q:  our child is 8 months old and i am the sole income provider. would shared custody be an option for him or how can i get sole custody? what happens if i want to relocate to a different country with the child (due to family reasons)? do i need consent or full custody first? we were not married but lived together for 4 years. i have always been sole income provider during the last two years.

A:  David's Answer:  "Shared Custody" technically means the child lives exactly 50% of the time with each of you. The question becomes: after you split up, would such an arrangement be feasible? If you wish to relocate to a foreign country, you would need his express consent - and then have that consent incorporated into a court order OR you would need to have a custody/relocation trial in Family Court. Schedule a consultation with a NYC Child Custody attorney for a full assessment.  -- David Bliven, Bronx Child Custody attorney (

Would my chances for custody (as the father) improve if I remarried? What considerations does the court consider ?

Q:  Additionally, the mother has been blantantly disregarding every order of visitation. My daughters are now 14 & 16 years of age.

A:  David's Answer: In & of itself, your remarriage would seem to have little impact. One would need to consider whether you're moving to a better living environment by virtue of your remarriage, as well as your daughter's relationship with your new wife. Given the ages of your daughters, their preferences will be a major factor in the case. You're best advised to schedule a consultation with a NYC Child Custody attorney for a full assessment. -- David Bliven, Bronx Child Custody attorney (

Saturday, January 4, 2014

What if ex/ wife doesn't want kid anymore?

Q:  ex has a new child and a new bf.Divorce signed by not final by judge. she has custody in divorce. i have a lawyer for the our seven year old daughter "hit" her little brother. giving me a week prep time to get her or "I wont see her again". I don't have no support system, live far from her school, will likely receive no child support in return, i sometimes overnights with no system setup to watch her, my apartment is a studio no time for larger one. what should i do, she txt me this recently

Additional information
i sometimes work overnights

A:  David's Answer:  What do you think she means by "you won't see her again?" Do you think she means she'll take off with the child, or do you think she means to harm the child? If the latter, you may wish to consider taking custody of the child AND calling ACS. You may need to file a motion in the divorce cases to modify the settlement. -- David Bliven, Bronx Child Custody attorney (

There is no visitation order. Can I deny the non custodial parent visitation if it means sending the child on an airplane?

Q:  I have sole custody of the child.

A:  David's Answer:  Yes, as without a court order, access is "as agreed upon" & if you don't agree, the child doesn't go. That said, you should have a good reason for not sending the child, as willingness to foster a relationship with the non-custodial parent is a factor the Judge will consider if the non-custodial parent sues for custody.  -- David Bliven, Bronx Child Custody attorney (